hafiz

(?)

2010-05-16T07:49:00.000-07:00

Daddy invited his religious teacher to come over
and conduct religious class here.
The whole group comes over too.

Its been YONKS since we had it at our place.

my sis and i stayed in the room and accompanied this small girl
oh gosh, i dont know her name
wait let me ask her
she's here

she said her name's syarifah
i dont how it's spelt properly haha

she can't spell herself

let the picas do the talkingggg

oooh, i think its the first time my eyes look brown
haha slow
but i rather natural jet black eyes and hair !

arent her eyes just beautiful

if im not wrong, she's got arabic blood too
like me !
but im not gorgeous
hais, too bad for me then

stupid pimple -.-

Better than Justin

2010-05-15T07:28:00.000-07:00

ive been getting sick of justin bieber
haha dont know why
and im not really into his songs anymore

and guess what,
i found someone who's better!
while i was on youtube

he's so gonna own justin
HAHAHHA

clique 6

2010-05-08T03:22:00.000-07:00

i know
yes, i am aware fully

i truly am the main reason for all this

i am the cause of the state that we're in now

i am the one to blame for the random times every one of you look back,
to reminisce and miss the times we all had
and wish
that things could have stayed as it were

you must have blamed me already
its really fine.
who else can you blame it on anyway?
i blame myself too.

i was just like any other average-life boy
but it wasnt bad at all,
if not for these people

i can't deny being afraid of coming into a new environment
and new faces.

i at first only had gwen and fiona
these two girls were two of those that can really make everyday
seem so so special

these two girls never fail to bring laughter
with their antics and words

we called ourselves PIONEER POWER!
hahha
lame, but we loved it

than slowly i met deon and through him,
elena and zeke
and through me, they got to know fiona and gwen.
so deon and i introduced all of us to each other,
well that was easy.
all of us were open people.

i was very close to deon
and and spoke alot about my two favourite girls during that period
i cant help loving them and speak non-stop about them

oh oh, i matchmade deon and gwen tgt!
HAHAHAH
wtf

deon's been a great guy
he's a crazy guy now, being all so enthusiastic.

i can almost not remember that he wasnt as enthu
in doing things we asked him to.

he was a rather 'keep-in' boy.
open he might be, but he doesnt go all out for the fun of it haha.
he does now.

elena was rather close to me too, one period in time
i rmb the pencil box incident most.
the funniest thing that happened to me, and a new friend.

it was our first day of school
she sat behind me
free periods of course, first day.
just a get to know thingy for our class.

oh and btw, the 6 of us (3from pioneer & 3 from shuqun)
were all in the same class
the best class we've been in!
1b! and also 2b !

moving back,
i turned back and was talking to her.
(oh, i rmb her ah-ma specs haha)

i was wearing a black jacket.
her pencil box was black.
i rested my arm on her pencil box.
she wanted to take her big pencil box to hug it
and accidentally took my arm instead,
cos my jacket was the same colour as her pencil box.
i was shocked.
we started laughing hysterically.

lucky nv hug my arm.
HAHAH

and zeke,
i didnt start out that close w him.
he was a very quiet boy.
never really initiate conversations.
but i still liked him being w us too, really.

and oh,
well,
i was a very temperamental boy during those days.
):
i dont even like talking about it.
very very temperamental and petty
sheesh
okay enough. haha

and zeke and deon didnt really like me much at first
):

i only knew that ard end of sec 3
way long after that HAHA
glad ive changed, thats what they say
im not trying to self-praise here HAHA

it really felt nice hanging around w these 6 people
~~click 5~~ clique 6
it felt like a family
there was love
there was comfort
there was happiness

but families can break, can't it..

i still love clique 6.
and i know they do too.

can we still hang out someday?
someday before we all graduate?

at least a farewell thing?

kite

2010-05-02T04:52:00.000-07:00

A friend or loved one can be like a kite.
Sometimes you've got to let loose of it abit.

The further it is from you,
the more beautiful it flies, the happier it is
even though You feel distant from it
and actually want it to fly closer to you.

Let It be happier ,
if not both of you silmultaneously.

But remember, Don't let it go.

cute or what

2010-04-30T04:44:00.000-07:00

science practical exam

2010-04-29T01:49:00.000-07:00

Not my day not my day
hahahhaha

science practical exam:
(for chem)

- forgot what lime water was, as in which solution
(a few questions needed this)

- burnt my finger when i held the hot test tube that i used for heating ( silly me )

- broke one test tube when i accidentally let go of it ( hmph )

- cracked another test tube when i washed it with cold water
immediately after it was used for heating ( forgot. dumb )

- ard the last 20 minutes or so, realised what limewater was.
one of the few bottles in front of me, under its scientific name,
actually had the label ' (limewater) ' .

my instincts told me (before i notced the label)
that either two of the other solutions apart from it, was it.
but actually none of them were.
no wonder i had no reactions, no white precipitate formed haha
glad that i saw, 20 minutes to the end of paper.

the rest of the day,
well,
not that much better either.

Things are better left unsaid.
it doesnt change anything, whether i spill or not.

i dont know what i feel about people anymore-
people around me.
or what they feel or think.

i give up.

haha

well, life~

i rather focus on my studies most right now.
glad that im improving in this area(self-study).
hope it shows in my results !

peaciey outiey ~

study

2010-04-25T04:40:00.000-07:00

gotta cut down on internet usage
and continue studying more !

oh my, phyics actually isnt that hard
it just needs a little bit more of understanding

but im still having trouble with chemistry
its like handling with something i can't see!
ugh, hate it.

Happy Birthday ESYK !

2010-04-24T06:07:00.000-07:00

HAPPY 15TH BIRTHDAY
EUGENE SIOW YEE KIAT !

the poke-cupcakes (cover) were hard efforts of
colleen, gwen, elena, pei ni, deon and zeke and i!
very the tiring!
some of them even stayed over at my house until 10pm
to finish it
and it was a thursday
school next day,
mini celebration for eugene

ours was during recess
we surprised him with the poke-cupcakes
YEAH MANNNNN

and and these are actually rainbow cupcakes!
when u bite them.
pretty colours lay out inside!

aiyah difficult explain,
when i have picts i'll post k!

and we went to ECP earlier today
meeting up at 8.30am
to further celebrate his birthay
a kinda get-together thingy

he's actual birthday's tomorrow, 25TH APRIL!

HOPE YOU LOVE EVERYTHING WE HAVE DONE FOR YOU
YOU JEAN SIAO KIT KAT !

and also my mega stitch for you ^^

* More picts coming soon!
they're with gwen !

struggle

2010-04-17T22:30:00.000-07:00

Somehow i feel like im struggling
but somehow also i don't show that i am anymore

im finally starting to feel the stress academically-wise
eugene said he'd revise with me my sec three sciences
hope there'd be progress soon

the friends around me,
somehow i feel a little uneasy
oh, don't ask me why
its hard to explain
it just feels different

home,
isnt so sweet afterall
not really a place to run away from problems
once i get home, get scolded
even if i come home late, to study

and today, sunday,
i can't even go out to study
dad's reason was that i always come home late
im studying man
whether i have valid reasons to be home or not, he just wont accept it

MYE's next week
don't blame me for the bad results,
im trying.

is anyone else's life turning bad again?
im sure there is.

i want my genuine smile to last the whole day everyday

fuck, dad just came in and asked me to shut down and study

great

people

2010-04-13T04:33:00.000-07:00

People

In the process of making themselves be more liked,
people can actually make themselves detestable.

Some people can let you feel so comfortable to talk to,
almost about everything, someone to listen
but can lose your trust as he or she tells it to someone
w/o your permission, whether it is a secret or not.

People sometimes can't see what wrong others see
but the wrong in the wrong they see .

People lie or keep things to not upset others,
but they know that once found out,
they'll be much more upset.

People aren't who they really seem
the first few times you meet them or get to know them.

Sometimes People should only allow themselves to love,
only if they are able to accept the lost of it.
That's the beauty of true love- being able to accept it,
and also lose it if you have to.

People.

oh and finally,
People shoulg tag me moreeeeeeeeeee

TIOMAN ISLAND

2010-04-06T07:03:00.000-07:00

TIOMAN ISLAND
2nd - 4th April

Meet Thomas
he's from Switzerland
but works in Singapore.
our families made friends with him, seeing him being alone.

it was wierd for us to see someone going on a holiday,
to tioman,
alone.

hahah so we made friends.
and kinda sticked tgt throughout the journey,
waiting for each other at immigrations and also the break-stops

My family(dad's side) makes my cousin abang syafiq and i feel tall

Meet Abang syafiq
* abang= 'big brother' ( My cousin)
isn't it cool, how he styles his hair? haha

Thanks EUGENE !
for lending me your ipod filled with songs for me to listen to during the journey!

Abang, Cik Mia, Abang Syamil
* Cik Mia- Aunt Mia (abg syafiq's mum)
*Abg Syamil (abg syafiq's big brother)

spot the skull shapped island?

stitch was camwhoring in the ferry
haha wth

Upon arrivals,
after a TEN HOUR journey! (bus and ferry)
no joke, abg syafiq and i counted.
inclusive of meal and toilet breaks

what's with my hair psh

this was behind us in the previous picture
we stopped for awhile, looking and amazed by its beauty haha
and wondered why we werent staying there instead of the small rooms
we were going to haha

but we didnt know how bad our rooms were,
till we really saw them

Meet, my family .

( From left to right )
me. ibu(mum). abg syafiq. kakak(big sis). kakak khalisah(abg syafiq's big sister).
abang. ayah(dad). cik mia. and abg syamil's taking this photo
with his canon dslr

view of sea below the jetty
alot of fishes huh
and isnt the water just nice

view of the kids staying on the island, jetty-jumping and swimming
two w/o life jackets when they're still so young
haha
many sgporean or city kids their age would be too afraid to jump into the water
deep, and full of fish HAHA

it only looks nice from the outside, oh trust me.

first room: (the ladies)
kakak. kak khalisah. cik mia.

second room: (the couple)
my parents.

third room: (the guys)
abang, abg syafiq. abg syamil. me.

-.-

(they guy's room) the one nearest on the right

View from parent's room

look at their faces!
aren't they similar!
i took this haha

and this

and also this.
nobody took pictures of me, so i took pictures of them instead haha

Dinner

kak khalisah

abg syafiq on hammock
oh oh, they hung alot of hammocks around the island
for anyone to use
very comfy!

maybe i should have one in my room.
the thing is, i dont have a room!
i sleep in the living room with my sis! HAHAHAHH

oh yeah zeke, its your shirt im wearing

hehe (:

and oh oh, this is interesting.
the first night, THE WHOLE ISLAND BLACKED OUT!
as in, not everyone fainted like in FLASHFORWARD
but electricity got cut off
and the all the lights and everything got cut.
it happened because the island runs on a generator or something.
the backup generator wasnt fixed yet when the first one got faulty,
so the lights didnt come back soon enough, but later on in the night,
after they fixed both the generators.

everyone was so shocked!
and alot of eurasions visit pulau tioman too.
its known for its beautiful beach and marine life, esp for diving and snorkelling
even they, the eurasions(younger ones actually) went wild and noisy

and yeah, being afraid of the darkness,
i panicked.
but soon got used to it, and my eyes started to adapt.
there was still the moonlight, and the gazzillion stars!
ooh, beautiful sky it was

the three sisters of pulau tioman
we wondered how she knew the \m/
coool

dont ask about the wierd colour combination
i was actually intending to wear my white pants instead
the colour of my neck area of the diving shirt

but its pockets tore
actually it tore abit alr, wasnt so obvious.
but i wasnt careful and it tore more):
and and it'd show my sexy thigh
im not cheap you know
^^

about to camwhore
we actually brought our tripods for our dslr-s hahah

this china couple was busy taking a picture tgt, behaving intimately
and i suddenly thought of doing this hahah

and this
^^
but the fun was alr over
this was showing them, coming back to shore

believe it or not, this guy actually tripped
it may look cool or that he's posing
but he stepped on a rock and is about to fall (but which he didnt)
hahahha

my brother caught this lady camwhoring by the beach
haha what the hell him

preparing for snorkelling

open shower!
toilet was too disgusting
so we decided to bathe here

before we though of this open shower,
we actually bathed with the pipes outside our 'houses'.
there's a pipe at the foot of every house
haha bloody fun it was

and and water EVERYWEAR was cold
because all the water came from the mountains
fresh, but freezing cold
ESP IN THE MORNING!
we do bathe in our own toilets though, but not much.
i go to my parent's one, as theirs are abit more cleaner

epic fail HAHAH

this long path doesn't have any lamp-posts
it was about 3-4 minutes walk from our rooms to the small shops and jetty
imagine the first night,
we were from the shops
and had to walk back later in the night
hahahha
it was really difficult, seriously

mine!
my idea, my hands hahah

wan's shop.
wan's the one at the top right

nah, SHE's a Man.
not a tranny though.
he/she was very friendly to us everytime we visited her shop

oh oh and exceptionally nice to my brother when he and abg syafiq(only)
went on to get something
HAHAHHA

my brother and abg syafiq shared this:

wan: want buy this also? *smiles*

abg: nah, its okay.

wan: sure? (in a cheeky tone)

abg: yah.

wan: okay, want a plastic bag?

abg: no need, thanks (:

wan: sure? (in the same cheeky tone)

HAHAHHAHAHHAHA
so funny
we all went laughing hard, literally

and and one more:
my brother wanted to ask the price of something in the shop

he called out to wan: kak! how much is this eh?

abg syafiq 'scolded' my brother: oi! what kak! ABANG LAH!

HAHAHHAHAHHA

meet wan
or wani
hahaha
but actually, he is quite pretty huh?
our families agreed

rings found in his shop
nice ey?

ramly burger was what we kept eating there
there wasnt much nice food to eat ):

and and there was also bbq corns and bbq chicken!
both only at night
and also cup corns!
they had the sweet flavour(the usual)
and also milk flavour!
we kept getting the milk one as we cant get it elsewhere, true?

abg syafiq tried this reggae hat on me
he just got it and wanted to see how it looks
he also didnt want to wear it cause it might spoil his hair,
he had alr styled his hair nicely haha

JETTY JUMP!!

they guys went for jetty jump
we were so excited
but got really scared when we looked down from the jetty
hahaha
it looked deep and the fish scared us more haha
what if we get bitten!

but the fact is, we've all done jetty jumps before haha

my brother shocked us when he suddenly said okaylah i go first
and there he went,
plunging into the water
we were shocked yet surprised

next was abg syamil
the second oldest

than abg syafiq

and i was last, the youngest
i was really scared.
idk why HAHAH
the prev time i jumped,
i had a life jacket!

but i can swim, im just afraid i couldnt float back up again
i hesitated for awhile and they kept calling out to me, asking me to jump

not long after, after kakak and kak khalisah came,
i jumped in

HAHAHHAHA
i know i look wierd, was very scared
there was my brother, promising he'd save me if anyth were to happen to me
but nah, i was capable of making myself stay afloat and alive

kak khalisah soon joined in
she swims very well

kakak's too scared.

mum says this looks like an alien
haha how cute

the guys(three from the left) going DIVING
far left is their guider/instructor(?)

abg syafiq and i didnt get to go
maybe it was too expensive
or or maybe my dad was worried we can't
oh well

cousins

sun about to set

whose sillhouette is this again?
i think it's my sisters' hahha

before plunging in

Daddy feeding bread to fishes

My bread ran out pretty quick
i was excited and kept on feeding quickly
hahahah

The fish like camwhoring too
he keeps appearing
coool~

eek
this was during our lunch break during snorkelling
at white sands beach
the sand nearer to the water
was really beautiful!
white, and soft !

eatinggggg

boat jump (?)

this was near shore btw, if youre wondering
they anchored the boat to the beach
when everyone else was resting or having lunch on the beach
or swimming in the waters

so we just went up to out boat and started jumping! haha

i think this is after i vomitted
haha maybe i do get sea sick.
not really, its the life jacket that keeps coming up to my neck
when im the waters (when snorkelling) that makes me naseous.

its so much better to swim w/o it.
Like the jetty jump!

and it feels much better in the water than on the boat!
its worse on the boat !
so move-y !
oh and my sister's afraid of fish too

when she was in the water, she kept clinging onto people
and didnt stay long inside
kept gg up hahah

they said that she was a scaredy cat

Ibu and Cik Mia

OVERALL,
THE TRIP TO PULAU TIOMAN WAS A VERY MEMORABLE ONE

But we wouldnt want to come again, because of the roomsss
HAHHAHAH
everything else was GREAT though (:

oh oh btw, these are only pictures from our dslr(my siblings and i)
and also the underwater camera my sis borrowed from her friend
there are more in abg syamil's dslr !
HAHAHHA
nevermind, these are enough (:

E Math Mock Exam

2010-04-06T03:38:00.000-07:00

E MATH MOCK EXAM TODAY
WAS
THE EASIEST PAPERRRR

to fail !

haha that should sum it all up

thought of something cool in class today

someone suddenly said,
'ANYHOW SAY ONLY !'

and it reminded me of the korean greeting !
anihaseyo or something

try this!
ANYHOW SAY-OH !
hahah

cool rightttttttttttt

egg

2010-03-28T00:06:00.000-07:00

HAPPY EGG

right eugene?
^^

Knife's coming soon!

hahahhahaha
so lame, but great fun

you dweeb

2010-03-27T23:58:00.000-07:00

its not even yours
and neither is it.

you dweeb.

play at victoria concert hall

2010-03-27T22:15:00.000-07:00

SRI WARISAN
PRESENTS

ANAK WAYANG
Dance . Music . Theatre

imran zahid syabil fahmi ALHZ khairul

The play/musical was Good
but there are parts which we couldnt link together haha

The props and lighting were awesome
they even have subtitles! in english
they pulled down the white screen abit,
low enough to not block anything

and u know what,
in the midst of the play,
they even play videos of the people of the past who used to be
Anak Wayang-s (people who were in the malay theatre industry),
sharing their experiences

and the best part was,
there was live music
for the different moods
malay kinda music and malay instruments haha

i realised that the Malays
like to keep our culture alive
and also to educate and remind us of our forefathers' time,
especially through plays
and even competitions like the Sajak one i just participated in.

I'm proud to be a Malay somehow,
not wanting to forget our rich culture and past

hahaha

and and i can make a comparison
between hanging out with Malays and Chinese
my own personal experience that is.
a brief one.

Being with malays, i dont have to worry about being left out
somehow, i always have someone to talk to
and everyone else does to.
jokes are laughed at and enjoyed by everyone.
we dont have to stress so much on where to eat and such,
everyone's just so easy going and goes w the flow.
(or maybe we just have the same cravings for the same type of food
for that moment haha)
not photogenic enough, and also dont really enjoy taking photos.
i laugh alot at their jokes and my own, make people laugh alot.

Being with Chinese,
sometimes you feel abit left out
or worry that someone might be left out.
but its very relaxed too, alot of funny jokes to be shared,
though not all will laugh most of the time haha.
half the time, we stress on where to eat
but its only because of one or two people.
after deciding, everyone would be happy even if its not their initial choice.
very photogenic and likes photos
i laugh alot, mostly at my own jokes, make people laugh, not all the time though
haha

so yeah, that was just a brief one.

both are great to hang out with i guess
hahahha

but i guess im still hanging out more with the Chinese,
as usual.
used to it alr HAHAH

foresee

2010-03-25T07:09:00.000-07:00

FORESEE;
only the best .

get it? get it?
(FOUR C), Only the best .

whore

2010-03-25T07:00:00.001-07:00

oh lookie lookie,
you look just like a whore

fuck you very much (:

reach out

2010-03-21T05:45:00.000-07:00

Very hard i have
Been trying to reach out
To the one that right now
I'm thinking about

While struggling goes this soul
So easy, the other party
Always to be with someone
Anyone else but this somebody

SAJAK COMPETITION PICK-CHAS

2010-03-21T02:24:00.000-07:00

SAJAK COMPETITION

Though we didnt clinch any wins,
we were very estatic as we achieved our main aim
- to have a GREAT experience and GREAT fun
esp performing something like this

and sure we did ^^

PREPARATION
ON
COMPETITION MORNING:

DRESSING UP
&further practices:

our lovely IT crew
lights and sounds I/C
the amazaing effect that was given was all by them
GREAT JOB GUYS

UPON ARRIVAL
NUS
LECTURE 13 :

ACTUAL PERFORMANCE :

END.

TERIMA KASIH

competition day

2010-03-18T04:40:00.000-07:00

PERTANDINGAN
MENDEKLAMASI SAJAK
-melalui cara yg creatif

POETRY
-through the most creative way
COMPETITION

ESOK

TOMORROW

i dont wanna aim on the win i guess
let's aim for the fun and experience guys !
hahahah

doctor says

2010-03-18T04:35:00.000-07:00

doctor said my temperature was quite high
my throat is rather red
and im kinda chesty
(which i think means difficulty in breathing, cause im facing that haha)

asked if i alr had my dinner
said yes
and he asked me to eat the medicine as i got home
my temperature would go higher

ugh shitfuck

the first ever tablet,which i have ever eaten,
that was dissolved in hot water
which leaves such a disgusting taste in the throat
even aft drinking loads of water !

its even stronger than the cough medicine i ate after!
i dont even dare swallow my saliva now!

ahh
):

falling

2010-03-16T00:10:00.000-07:00

falling
what do you first think of?
and negatively or positively?

falling DOWN?
falling OUT of love?

falling IN love?

well,
im falling SICK.

hahah lame-o

i think im straining my body with the activities i am in ):
it alr started with never ending fatique
now my body aches all over
and i so feel feverish

)):

going for mini SP experience tmr
i dont feel well enough to go,
but its a very RARE chance!
haha
the only one im gonna get actually

and compeition's this saturday):

will be well soon enough?

and pulau semakau trip with a few schoolmates on sunday

damn do i need to start resting !

haha

)):
ALHZ feels lousy

speech day rehearsal

2010-03-15T04:44:00.000-07:00

went over to eugene's crib at 11 plus

head on to sch at ard 12.30
to meet mdm alinah
practised reading the SAJAK with akif
mdm alinah has put khairi out of the compeition
and is asking me to read his parts

omg, it is NOT easy
hahahah
must have emotions, correct tone, and all

competition's this saturday T.T

opened band room at ard 2.50pm
took marching snare and bass drum
to the canteen with jason and kenenth
eugene came abit late
with the food i asked him to help me buy !
omg i havent paid him HAHAH

had speech day rehearsal in canteen
(wet weather)
played the drum solo with the other drummers
for the contigents of uniform groups to march

weather got better and we went out in the open

very the tiring manzzzz hahahhaha

eugene went off abit earlier to meet his mom for
Alice in wonderland
jason went with willy
and kenneth and i went to jp

he kept saying he wanted to eat sth hot and salty
we had no idea what,
except for fries HAHA

and i kept asking for yami yoghurt

so while thinking i got yami yoghurt first
he just got one too
hahahha

so cool
yami yoghurt with kenneth
HAHA

and my yami yoghurt card is fully chopped!
you know how one won't really get sick of yami yoghurt
so after eating our peach medium
i got the free macadamian nut medium!
hahahha

and home

now, im TRYING to focus on my
DNT layout pad!

sheesh~
im so behind schedule ! haha

worries for upcoming competition

2010-03-14T06:00:00.000-07:00

SAJAK: The best words, put in the best way.
Something like a poem, but it doesn't have to rhyme.
Songs use this method.

The whole team for the malay SAJAK competition cum drama
is pissed off by now
all at one thing
or should i say,
one person

ahmad khairi

while the rest of us are trying VERY hard to put our best efforts
for the competition
he has only come for not even FIVE practices!

i tried talking to him
asking him to be more commited
and he said he has other commitments
hello,
i said,
i have commitments too?
and guess what he said.

he said, different what.
you find commitments but commitments find me

UGHHH TOTALLY GOT TURNED OFF

just last friday
mardhiyyah scolded him during recess
saying we have only a week
and that everyone else has their commitments too
she also said that its difficult for us,
and especially mdm alinah
who cant do much cause we cant have a full group practice!
we have difficulties figuring out the formation w/o full attendance

and he said
relak ah relak ah
if mdm alinah gives me attitude,
i back out.

khadijah and i gave the same response after mardhiyyah told us that
we agreed that HE was the one with the attitude
-.-

all of us want him out now seriously

akif, who rarely comes for practices
doesnt worry us actually.

we know he's alr good at reading the sajak
and and
we understand he has to work on his dance competition which will be held first
and we know he'd be a quite fast learner when it comes to this
well, he's a dancer?

so we look forward to his attendance now that his competition
is already over

but khairi,
ugh
no hope

mdm alinah let him be one of the three to read the sajak too
which is a good role.
the sajak reader is very important.
she put him as it as he can ve rather stiff when it comes to movements

but we all realise
that he's not even good at reading the sajak
no emotions
and monotone.

UGH!
not good in any area, yet not coming for any practices!

we're all so pissed off

hope mdm alinah thinks of something,
and hope that she considers our feelings of wanting him out.
maybe we can just be better off with 7 people.
at least it doesnt trouble us,
and especially mdm alinah
who stays up late in the night, racking her brains
just for this.

really, she does.

and know what,

COMPETITION DAY: THIS SATURDAY
its sunday today, which means
6 MORE DAYSSSSSSSSS

And we are the FIRST team to showcase our item
meaning, we cant really have a practice before showcasing

great.

results

2010-03-14T04:29:00.001-07:00

left: EOY 2009, right: term 1 2010

English: C5, C5
Malay: B3, B4
Additional Mathematics: F9, C6
Mathematics: E8, F9
Science (Phy,Chem): F9, D7
Combined humanities(ss,lit): C6, C6
Design & Technology: B3, C6

grandmum's birthday

2010-03-11T05:06:00.001-08:00

Happy Birthday Grandmum !

cool, ain't the Winnie The Pooh i made for her !?

tomorrow, the big day

2010-03-10T05:29:00.001-08:00

PERFORMING TMR
FOR TALENT WEEK

DoubleH D
(Hisyam,Hafiz,Deon)

A.K.A

Double High Definition

HAHA LAME RIGH!
yeah, me and my big lame idea
kidding only, but i still like it though

DoubleHD will be performing:
KNOCKS YOU DOWN

Also, we have
BHG

Brown Hair Girls
(not my idea HAHAH)

A.K.A

PCG
(Pussy Cat Girls or also Pei ni Gwen Colleen)

They will be performing
KNOCK KNOCK- LENKA
Its funny that both our song choices have the words KNOCK in them
haha
we just like knocking i guess

and finally,

EUGENE AND COLLEEN

They will be performing
BABY- JUSTIN BIEBER

we are all scaredddddddddddddd

hahahha

OH AND I JUST REMEMBERED!

JVCB PERCUSSIONISTS
The whole of my batch
namely,
hakim
kenneth
jason
mei hui
pei ni
jia wei
shi ting
and myself

will be performing
A Medley of tunes arranged by ourselves !

^^

GOOD LUCK TO ALL OF YOU/US YEAH !

Blue Cross Thong Kheng Home

2010-03-10T05:06:00.000-08:00

CIP!
BLUE CROSS THONG KHENG HOME
mentally disabled patiens

i really have to thank YV for all the guidance it gave us
and the experience there was much easier and comfortable
for gwen, deon, jia nie and i

picas!
grabbed from gweny's blog!
her phone camera's awesome

14 january babies goof around.
its just what they do.

attempting to model
wtf i know
hahah

epic fail much

our group for our area
fun bunch of peepos !

we were supposed to clean the staircase
up to the forth floor
i found it amusing and wierd
because they gave us cloths and buckets of soapy water
to clean the walls

ive never done that before
and i didnt know people do
hahahah
stacie, deon and i felt as if
we were actually cleaning off the white paint !
our cloth began to turn white

it wasnt easy
alot of patches on the walls
haha

and yeah, half the time spent camwhoring
oops haha

but we did great at interacting witht he residents there
and tryign to have fun with them
sing-along and such

otw home,

and gwen and i played the euphonium in the band room for awhile
before going on home

10 bucks

2010-03-07T05:09:00.000-08:00

had breakfast at mac with hakim
before going for Balloon Interest Group(B.I.G) gathering
at jurong spring cc

i learnt winnie the pooh!
by looking at mr wong doing it haha

asked fathiah to meet up after gathering,
accompanied hakim get his haircut
and we went to teh tarik

a female malay stall vendor saw my balloons
and asked for two flowers
i made and gave them to her
she offered to pay but i rejected the offer

i walked away with a smile,
to where i was sitting with fathiah
(hakim went up to get ready for his religious class)
but she followed me
and insists on paying
i kept on rejecting
and she left it on the table

it was the red note
10 bucks
fathia and i were shocked
i was scared
it was TOO much
esp for two flower balloons!
the lady said it was okay

i then decided to give her my road runner sculpture
which was still not even near the worth of 10 bucks!

still shocked now hahah
even after hours
treated hakim and fathiah drinks

went over to grandmum's house
her birthday.

oh damn i wanna pee
'have been holding it in
haha
CIAOOO~

miracles can happen

2010-03-03T03:50:00.000-08:00

why do i say miracles can happen?

becauseeeee

i passed A Math test for the very first time since the start for last year!!
even F9 for last year's EOY !
PATHETIC AREN'T I

hahahhahahahahhahahh~

and i did very well that !
it was a differentiation test
and i got upon 15,
14!!!

WOOOHOOOO~~~~~

gotta try and keep it up!
just like mr yeo asked me to
i'll try !

can't wait to break it to my tutor!
she'll be so happy ^^

EXTRAORDINARY

2010-03-02T03:35:00.001-08:00

EXTRA-ORDINARY KIDS!

yu qi designed it for us,
for our birthday.
ain't he a sweet one?

oh, and he's very thoughtful too ^^

couple tee!
the first time i ever had it !

HAHAH

or any couple things in fact !

and i do need new tops !
hahhaha

THANK YOU LIEW YU QI!!

happy birthday kenneth

2010-03-02T03:32:00.000-08:00

HAPPY SWEET SIXTEENTH

KENNETH KWEK KAI WEN !

(PICTURES GRABBED FROM GWEN'S BLOG)

Talent Week 2

2010-02-27T02:21:00.001-08:00

Talent Week 2

- Singing with Deon Chien Hoe Kheng

- making music with JVCB PERCUSSIONISTS
(a medley of familiar tunes arranged by ourselves)

TetraPulze

2010-02-27T00:43:00.001-08:00

had malay practise at 8am today

it lasted till 12pm
with Khadijah, Atikah, Rahayu, Syafiah, and Akif

it was the longest and most tiring practise we ever had haha
but it also means that we learnt much more of what we're gonna do
and this time, we had our song effects
i like ~

and we do have to work hard,
because the full-dress rehearsal is next saturday!

march 6th!
no time to waste!
rehearsal is as important.
we should be using the rehearsal only to familiarize with the stage space,
and also the lightings and other IT stuffs

and after practice,
i joined in with the dancers, for danceworks
(anti-drug abuse competition),
namely Akif, Hakheem, Shahril, Shobana, Humaidi and Qistina(not dancing)
just randomly learnt their steps
by looking and also by being taught manually haha

they kept asking me to join them

actually, i want to.
but im alr busy as i am T.T
i told them that
and also that, even if i join,
i wont be be able to make it for all practices
than they said it was okay because im alr a fast learner
and they needed me
haha aww~

aiya see how lah ):

practice for poetry competition was fun
dancing with tetrapulze was fun

and now im tired haha

chingay

2010-02-18T06:03:00.000-08:00

CHINGAY TMR

WILL BE GOING AS STUDENT BALLOONISTS!

i wanna meet taufik batisah haha

mirage

2010-02-17T04:01:00.000-08:00

had our first 'malay poetry through drama' practise
after literature supp today.
okay, the previous sentence doesn't make all the sense,
since i didnt even attend lit supp haha.

usually first practises are like, boring
and no hands-on
but this on,
we started getting down to business !

we did practical stuff!
started working on some 'actions' and ideas
i dont think i should share it here,
scared participants from other schools see HAHAHA
so paranoid

i just like our ideas
mdm alinah's to be exact
hahah

and guess what,
WE ONLY HAVE TWO WEEKS LEFT !
(excluding this week)

TWO DAMN WEEKS DX

to rehearsal actually
but we still need to get everything done by then!
the rehearsal is more for the IT stuff, positioning,
you know~
these stuff
so, we HAVE to be ready by then !
we only have 20 minutes of rehearsal on the actual stage !
gahhh

and we're meeting up almost every other day
there's one tmr
hahah

tired as i may be,
i wanna put in my best.
i dont even complain about practices.
in fact, i enjoy attending it!
i want jurongville to win this!
hahah

GO TEAM JURONGVILLEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

OMG OMG OMG AND I JUST REALISED SOMETHING

CHINGAY'S THIS FRIDAY!
TWO MORE DAYS !

HAHHAHAH
WOOHOOOOO

i'll be going !
as a student balloonist !
making free balloons for the spectators

omg omg
i heard taufik batisah
and tabhita are coming!

hahahha
cooooool~~

dad issues, again

2010-02-15T05:13:00.000-08:00

what's up with you dad,
seriously

enough with your biased treatments against me
enough with your unfair treatments towards me

my sister started using the computer right after she woke up
which was at about 11am
she used until u came back home at around 2pm++
3 hours

i then used awhile,
which last for about what, just an hour or two?

than had my late lunch,
when she took over again
using from ard 4 until at abt 6pm?
abt 2 hours

i woke up from afternoon nap,
and took over again,
from 6.30 pm until 7.30pm
1 hour

sis: app. 5 hours
me: app. 3 hours

and now im using it from 9pm-10pm (like every other night)
which adds it all up to app.4hours

and u came in and started your crap

dad: use again? just now use already right?
now use again

hafiz: what, kakak also use from just now what?

dad: u always answer like this.
ya lah, both of you keep using.
(only saying this to make himself seem more fair -.-)
and you,
ask you study, practise math never.
others do wrong things, you follow and say they also.
good things dont want.

hafiz: i study what.
just yesterday?
(he saw it himself)

ugh,
why can my sister get it all easier

its so obvious my dad loves her most and favours her
even my cousin notices that

UGH

if you want to favour her,
than go ahead
for all i care

but dont make it harder for me okay?
please

jurongville

2010-02-14T02:53:00.000-08:00

ooooh ~

eden school

2010-02-13T06:06:00.001-08:00

Band performed
CHINESE NEW YEAR STORY &

DA DI HUI CHUN
at Eden School last friday morning

all picture credits to GWENDOLYN PNG WEI TING

poetry through drama

2010-02-13T05:38:00.001-08:00

joined a interschool malay 'poetry through drama' competition

with 7 of my other friends.

i put the word 'malay' in bold
and 'poetry' in italic,
cause it'd be a challenge for me

cause im not that strong in malay,
especially in speaking
and and it has to be even much better since its through poetry!

Jurongville will be showcasing our item FIRST out of 13 schools!

Being first is good, as mdm alinah said,

so that we can set the standard.

woots!

more details when nearing the date yeah !

the comp is on march 20th.

so gonna be much busier now ):
esp when us, sec fours, have supps or pracs
on almost every other day
mdm alinah said, we might even have to meet after extra classes

and even maybe be excused from CCAs
and and even on sat

the one i mind least is the saturday one
i'd be free and we can have the whole day

but im gonna put in alot of effort !
i do want this!
this is what i like doing,
PERFORMING ! hahah

this year's theme:
FATAMORGANA
which means
MIRAGE

the idea is mainly about something that seems like such,
something as you see,
but actually isnt as it seems.

get it get it?
haha

more chim like last year.
last year's was reflection.

ugh
which reminds me of DNT !
the theme this year is also more difficult than that of last year's!

last year's was cleaniness.
and this year's, SELECTIONS
which reminds me also,
i havent continued on my coursework!
dayummm~

camp half blood

2010-02-12T17:36:00.000-08:00

PERCY JACKSON& THE OLYMPIANS
& THE LIGHTNING THIEF IS

A-W-E-S-O-M-E-E-E-E-E-E-E

Percy sometimes look like troy bolton/zac efron
hahahhaah

and annabeth
sometimes look like Selena Gomez
right Eugene !
hahhaha

i dont know why not many heard of this show
but instead, valentines day
hmph

so what if taylor lautner's hot
and taylor swift's beautiful?
haha

what the hell me?
HAHAHHA

yo yo peepos!
do watch percy jackson too yeah!

to the movies

2010-02-12T00:41:00.000-08:00

OFF TO GV

TO CATCH PERCY JACKSON

WITH EUGENE !

HOHOHOHOOHOH

HOHOHOOHOH

HOHOOHOHOHOHOHOO

HOHOHOHOOHOHOHOHOOHOHO~

dear tubists of JVCB

2010-02-11T05:12:00.000-08:00

we like to camwhoreeee

HAHAHAH

DEAREST TUBISTS OF JVCB (2010),

i just want to say that im very proud of your response today,
for the talk i had for you guys,
trying to help make u guys understand each other better
and to bond more.

thanks for participating sincerely

and and now trying to make it all better for the tuba section

GO TUBA SECTION!

make me more proud,
make the BAND proud ,
make the SENIORS proud !

i have faith in you ^^

and remember,
APOLOGIZING: NOT ONLY WHEN AT FAULT,

BUT IF YOUR LOVE FOR THE SECTION AND EACH OTHER

IS STRONGER THAT YOUR EGO

(:

AND OH!
MULYA!
my most commited sec one percussion junior !

im glad that you get what i was trying to mean,

that learning mallets doesn't mean you can't play the drums

a percussionists has to know how to play

EVERY instrument in percussion anyway?
so, it takes time,
don't worry.

you'll get to play the drums.
step by step k?
you're welcomed again!
glad you felt better and are more open-minded now haha

and don't cry anymore okay!
i very the worried ya'know!
you're my favourite junior!

so eager to be a band member.
she's been wanting to join band since primary school!
but her primary school doesnt have one
SAD haha

im so gonna reccommend her as an NCO
or maybe even, AN EXCO
why not?

haha

annoying

2010-02-10T01:41:00.001-08:00

HAHAH annoying or what!
man do i pity the guy at the bottom!

geez,
but funny though

haha

i smoke?

2010-02-10T00:40:00.001-08:00

(msn)

ZeeK; says:
Is it true?

ALHZ says:
what thing

ZeeK; says:
Are you smoking?
did you smoke?

ALHZ says:
huh no?
why suddenly say!
HAHAH

ZeeK; says:
sure not
its going round
and i heard it
are you sure hafiz
dont lie to me sucker

ALHZ says:
OMG I SWEAR I DONT SMOKE!
GO ARD WHERE!
SIAPA SPREAD
SUMPAH(swear) SEH!
do i look like i'd smoke?

ZeeK; says:
yes
haha

ALHZ says:
YOUR HEAD LAH
haha

wth?

hate

2010-02-08T05:34:00.000-08:00

There's only one person i hate now

THE MAN WHO MARRIED MY MOTHER

if it would be easy staying outside of this house,

and i wouldnt have to worry or care about anythg for myself

i swear i would

(edited)/(reblogged)

k, ill be nicer

There's only one person i ~~hate~~ don't quite like now,

THE MAN WHO MARRIED MY MOTHER

percy jacskon

2010-02-05T05:34:00.000-08:00

and here's a link to the new official trailer !
nicer!
http://www.percyjacksonthemovie.com/

&omg, he's Poseidon's son !
that's why he had the powers!
he's BORN to be a hero!

gahh, i think im so gonna be a fan of percy jackson!
like ahdila is of harry potter! HAHAHH

surely there will be other continuations of percy jackson!
like harry potter!
now its the LIGHTNING THIEF!
im so gonna catch it and understand the next ones !
wont regret like i did for harry potter! HAHAH

and the directors are the same as
Harry potter's !
two of his, i think

WHOOHOO!!

PERCY JACKSON

- Logan Lerman

band

2010-02-04T05:17:00.000-08:00

cool or what right

finally talked to the band
i dont know if it's going to work
felt as if it kinda left a little impact,
but not much like sery said
it isnt that easy to do so haha

my voice faltered in the middle of our speech somehow
and it sounded as if i was really going to cry
but i really tried to keep it all in
because
a leader shouldn't show his weakness in front of his people

im sorry to those whom i made you cry
but i also thank you guys for it somehow showed me that
you still have passion for JVCB
and you regret contributing to the way things are now
and really want to change

deon said that he nearly cried too when i nearly did
haha
but he can very well not show it at all

soh-ly, i vely emosional type of personn
HAHHA

but somehow,
like sery,
i could feel the spirit of JVCB reviving at the end of the session
when we did the 3 CHEERS FOR JVCB
the response was very loud

hahahha

and i can somehow feel that they do want to change
they do want the better for JVCB

but i hope its not temporary,
that it doesnt last ):

hope we have finally made a change
and that it continues on

DEAR MEMBERS OF JVCB, REMEMBER :

- CHANGE, FOR THE BETTER

AND

-"DO YOU BELIEVE" !

I HAVE FAITH IN YOU

nco meeting

2010-02-03T05:51:00.000-08:00

finally had an nco meeting today
though not everyone turned up,
we managed to discuss and give suggestions/ ways to improve
both the band's discipline and also their music playing

the standards of these two factors really have to be revived as it was

or even better

MR CHIA: DO YOU BELIEVE?
remember band? hahhahhaha

I LOVE JVCB!

gah, i so miss those much nicer times we had in JVCB,
with the batch that just graduated

FUN LOT

its time, to change.
change back to its usual form, and even- better.

gwengwen

2010-02-01T03:16:00.000-08:00

credits: gwendolyn PNG

GWENGWEN HAS A BLOG NOW~

GWENGWEN HAS A BLOG NOW~
WOOHOOO

HAHHAHAHA

>> GWENDOLYN'S BLOGGGGG

actually she already had a blog before

tinyspacerockets.bs.com

but she privatised it
and now, un-privatised it and even changed her url
she wants to start anew and no more of those emo posts
haha

typical gwen to hide her emotions and feelings
even knowing her for 10 years now,
i dont really know everything

OMG 10 YEARS !
OMG OMG OMG

I JUST REALISED

WE JUST JUST TURNED SIXTEEN!
MEANING ITS OUR TENTH ANNIVERSARY!!

HAHAH SO COOOL

and seven years of being in the same class, not straight that is haha

nazhiifah

2010-01-30T02:35:00.000-08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO NAZHIIFAHHHHHHHHHH

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOUUUU

we're sixteen !

woots !

HAHHAHAH

but we don't have the height of a 16-year-old !

(esp you ^^)

come back to visit singapore soon alright?

we HAVE to meet up again !

I MISS YOU SQUIREL 2!

love, your bro,

AFEEEEZZZ

A.K.A

SQUIREL 1

Zero

2010-01-30T02:17:00.000-08:00

got ZERO for A math class test (futher trigonometry)

my weakest topic

my first ever zero in my whole life !

gahhhh

but there's always a first time for everything right?

wth HAHAHHA

JVCB

2010-01-29T05:16:00.000-08:00

DISCIPLINE

badddd to worseee

really stressed and dont know what to do

audrey and jin yang came back to visit the band today
they teared upon dismissal,
being so disappointed with the band's current discipline

already very noisy in the band room,
yet still having fun while running for punishment

but the band doesn't see it the way we do..

It takes people who takes note of things, that notices things

we notice the bad discipline,
but all they had to say was that i was making a mountain out of a molehill..

hais..

will gather excos and ncos soon!
we so gotta talk !

ngee ann poly

2010-01-28T04:08:00.001-08:00

the DNT students had another trip to poly today

today was ngee ann poly

they had some talk, about one of the courses

met HUI XIAN!

A FREIND I MADE IN YVIP ! HAHAHHA

i forgot her name actually,

till i asked her to give me her contacts

oops~

we also got to tour around some booths,

we didnt for the knowledge

or whatever that we're supposed to actually benefit ,

but for the chops that could get us a free ice-cream and a gift haha

the gift wasnt that attractive lah

some holder, which had a rather wierd shape, to me

i dont know how the rest feels about it haha

there was also this design competition

where you had to design something random

with the little templates they gave

if i remembered correctly,

there were 2 curved lines and a straight one

i drew a vase with flowers

they said that it was a competition

of how many ppl from the same school would participate in it

and that that school would win

but i decided to put my efforts in it anyway,

likw i always do in drawing haha

the student leaders stood behind me as i was sitting there

focused and drawing

they kept saying that it was nice and telling other student leaders

haha i have to admit, it kinda felt good.

to whom wont it?

they kept on praising,

my other friends did too

they than said that top 7 students of the whole lot of us,

consisting dnt students

from 5 schools, won a prize in that competitiopn

for jurongville, there were two students

the rest were shouting my name so loudly

especially those who saw my work

it was james

HAHAH

they said it was cute ^^

than the next one,

they cheered for my name even louder, sounding more confident

it was the last name out of the 7

(but not in particular order)

it was noorafiqah

HAHAHAHAHHAAH

though i was rather sad, i was actually very happy for them

really,

im not trying to step humble okay! hhaah

i really felt that

people kept asking why i never win hahhaha

haiyoh, the student leaders gave me high hopes,

my friends did, everyone else did,

i did

HAHAHHA

i dont know what james drew,

but noora drew this remote control over a board with circular patterns

the straight line was one side of the remote

and she made circles out of the curved lines

lydia, shafiq and her(whom i sticked with)

also kept asking why i didnt win

and joked, saying that noora also like lazily did hers

she also went " ya lah! i also nv put in that much effort"

HAHHAHAH

reached school at around 5.10?

headed to the band room!

hahaha

practised for our performance/CIP at eden school!

woohoo ~

skin change

2010-01-27T05:05:00.001-08:00

YAY YAY YAY NEW SKIN !

hahahhaha

YAY ME ! (london's accent)

*clap clap*

TUMBLR

2010-01-27T04:24:00.000-08:00

http://www.alhz.tumblr.com/

blogger's purpose will remain as it is, the way i have been using it

and tumblr will be mainly for nice picts and quotes ! haha

and oh, do you know that i do have multiply?

its where i store photos. haha

http://www.smellyrainbows.multiply.com/

SO YEAH! hahah

i know readers, i havent been updating

that's cause i cant find a nice skin to replace this annoying one!

i dont have the mood to blog with this one, HAHAH

so yeah, be patient!
but keep coming back to check yeah !

on the bright side

2010-01-15T20:41:00.001-08:00

got to know of this video i watched from yuqi's tumblr
i think its worth sharing HAHAHHA

ON THE BRIGHT SIDE

and i didnt even realise that it was by never shout never till the end of the song

haha
ENJOY !

GRADUATED

2009-12-26T05:05:00.000-08:00

along with gwendolyn, eugene, deon and jia nie
I HAVE OFFICIALLY GRADUATED FROM YVIP 2009

hmm, i dont know if im coming back next year as a
team facilitator
i do want to really focus on my studies,
especially that its my O's next year

ill see how it goes
im sure the rest are seeing how also
even eugene, going through sec 3 which is rather important too

so yeah,
WE ARE PART OF THE YVIP FAMILY
AND WE WILL NEVER ABANDON IT!
(i hope HAHA )
we can even come back the year after next.

AND NEXT YEAR, I STRONGLY ENCOURAGE ALL OF YOU

TO PARTICIPATE IN THIS JOURNEY !
IT IS REALLY WORTH YOUR HOLIDAYS!
YOUR DECEMBER HOLIDAY

SING OUR SONG,
UNLOCK YOUR STORY

OUT IN THE PAPER

2009-12-22T17:43:00.000-08:00

YAYYYY

MY REPORT'S FINALLY OUT IN THE PAPERS!
BERITA HARIAN !

21ST DECEMBER
( so loooong, haha )

PAGE 9

MALAY READERS,
HAVE U READ?!
GO READ !!

HAHAHHAHAHHA

and there's a picture of us too!
this one:

cool or what
HAHA

i wanted to scan it into the computer
but i cant !

im not trying to brag
but its half a whole page
and my scanner's only A4 sized !

i'll take a pict of it and upload it i guess
HAHA

balloons can really bring happiness
i've tried it,
especially when im down

just twisting it into something,
it increases my happiness level

i love balloons ^^

what's wrong

2009-12-18T22:40:00.000-08:00

now what's up with you, mum
ive always thought my dad's the only one becoming a monster

but you're changing since the period not long ago,
when u fell out with him .

now both of you are out against me.
becoming more strict and fierce towards me
which only makes me SEEM like becoming worse

issit because u're more afraid of my dad now
cos he feels uve been to lenient on letting me do things
and that he dooesnt like it

do you now want to change
for him,
so that he wont be angry anymore
so that he'll be more contented with you,
especially with the way u handle me?

but what about me..
what about the voice that screams in my heart ?

not only screaming in anger,
but screaming for help.

stop reading my msgs,

read or unread by me

stop making me feel like a difficult child to handle

stop saying im not even trying to change

stop saying i care even less of what u ask of me,

im even more scared now

stop saying my (new) friends are influencing me to be a worse son
they are helping me to help you , believe it or not

stop misunderstanding me

stop wronging me

stop expecting me to understand u totally and even more,
but not try to f-ing understand me at all
and that u just want me to go

how u want and think MUST be the way

stop not trying to listen to my reasons when u wronged me
and only ending up saying u dont like the way i talk back
or my attitude.

you wronged me.
i was merely trying to explain,
but as usual u just refuse to listen
and stick to ur feelings about me being in the total wrong

i admit ive not been the best child u can have
and ive done quite alot with this new group of friends
like staying out late
(but for dinner,birthday celebration and celebration for end of attachment)
and even having a sleepover once

ive alr reasoned things out to you,
but u still choose to ignore it all.
why, mom
why

stop saying im forever at fault.

u know,
now i feel that ure becoming more of a monster than daddy is..

its terrifying for me do you know
when both of you, parents are strangling me

i rmb the period when u fell out with dad
i could still feel ur love and care for me

i heared u cry on the phone
when we were talking
and u did hear me cry too.
we had our own individual problems.

but since then on,
uve changed.
i dont feel any love from you
in fact,
i feel this slight hatred from you..

i need love
love from a family
frankly,
its been so so SO SO
long since i felt it

both my brother and sister
prefer each other

daddy loves big sister,
very very obvious and biased towards her

mommy loves them all more than she does me
in other words, loves me the least

i dont understand why im most problematic wherever i go

problematic in a sense that
i have alot of problems
and also that i bring alot of problems

this sucks man,

BIG time

but

2009-12-18T21:12:00.000-08:00

it is complete,

the number

but its not with me

but im okay with it,

'cause i know

there's bound to be more glee

can i have this dance

2009-12-13T01:20:00.000-08:00

WOW?

BERITA HARIAN

2009-12-13T00:41:00.000-08:00

its been weeks

i doubt berita harian is going to publish my report
on our school becoming champions of pushcart challenge `09
anymore

HAISH

i give up waiting

i have better things to look forward to (:

virginity

2009-12-12T23:44:00.000-08:00

ALHZ

HAS OFFICIALLY LOST HIS SWENSEN'S

VIRGINITY !

LIKE, FINALLY !

HYSTERELLA
celebrated jia yi's birthday(advanced)
at swensen's

personally, i wasnt even sure i was celebrating which one
that its her birthday,
or that it was my first time
after repeated complaints about not being there before

haha,
it was both i guess

i was so happy lah,
kept on repeating and whining,
and shocking people
when i say ive never been to swensens

and now, my new family has brought me there!
woots ! ~

and it really felt like we were a family
i never had this feeling when eating with a group of people before,
never.
neither did gwen

it started with people giving me small portions of their food letting me try
because they really wanted me to have a nice, sweet first time
it was really touching

and soon enough,
the whole table was sharing their food

i only ate a small portion of my dish,
because i kept giving away and eating others'
but it was worth it
i was still full
full in the stomach and felt full of love

oh ya, when we were ordering
i actually cried
some thought that those were tears of joy
but nah..

i felt pathetic
i felt scared

i was only left with 10 bucks,
and i could only afford the ice creams

gwen was very worried
soon, everyone figured that i was crying not bcos i was happy
and got worried too and started asking

gwen than asked my permission
if she could tell the reason for my tears

" aiya no lah,
he just very sad that he dont have enough money.
and not only does he feel embarrassed about it,
he also feels very scared to ask people to borrow him some money.. "

and everone was like
aiya nvm lah!
we treat you the remaining lah!
don't worry!
somemore your first time here,
must have it happy !
and your first time here, the more we want to treat you!

i continued crying cause i felt so loved and cared for
really didnt feel it before

i caught gwen looking at me, smiling
the smile which i know, that she was really happy
and doesnt want to let go of the moment

gwen: (whispers to me)
don't you feel loved here?
never had this feeling before hor?
feels like a family leh.

she also said that she would lend me money
if she had enough
but she only had 15bucks,
and she was worried that she might not have enough too
haha
silly gwen

HYSTERELLA really is a loving family
everyone cares for each other
we haven't quarelled at all
and we say nicely what we dont like about anyone
and now,
everyone's loved

and when we were walking around plaza singapura,
gwen had her arm over my shoulder

hafiz: gwen, i like it when you do this.
i feel loved (:

gwen: huh, really ah?
eh of course i love you what?

hafiz: but idk lah..
you know, u always bully me.
than now u treat me like this,
i can still feel that u still love me as much
even after knowing me for 9 years, going to 10

gwen: hafiz ah, i bully you cos i love you..

and bla3 we went on babbling

i went on home
as some of the few others went to stay over at
yu qi's semi-detached house

HYSTERELLA I LOVE YOU GUYS
and i hope we would never part,
not after our attachment,
not after our afterglow,
not ever.

oh btw, jia yi and sean also said that we are a better group of friends
than their NJC ones
and that's why she chose to celebrate her birthday with us (:

GO HYSTERELLA !
( hysteria + umbrella )

YU QI (BIBI)

KEVIN (BOBO)

SHU MIN

HAFIZ

GWENDOLYN

SEBASTIAN

SEAN

JIA YI

KAMARUL

YING JIE

SHAWN

GORDON

JUN WEI

YIH SIN

WEI LIANG

DEON (CHAN)

\m/_

and oh,

GWEN

i really love you
and i really hope that our very close friendship never ends
its going to be our tenth year anniversary next year on 2010

let's celebrate that along with our birthday okay!

14 january !

you're uber BOOMZ

\m/_

and pst,
i do still watch the video you made about us sometimes
the one you put slides of our pictures together,
dedicating to me
showing that u love me too,
with the messages you put in

i really appreciate it ^^

volunteers

2009-12-12T05:20:00.000-08:00

'Volunteers don't get paid, not because they are

worthless,

but because they are priceless.'

- Ren Ci Hospice - Our Book.

credits: deon's facebook's status

posts

2009-12-09T04:49:00.000-08:00

the previous post will officially be the last (very) long post
on SMELLYRAINBOWS.BS.COM

YAY HUH!
HAHA

YVIP CAMP 2009

2009-12-05T06:01:00.000-08:00

YVIP CAMP ROCKS !
(Youth Volunteer Involvement Programme)

it was, for the first time, combined with with SDSC
(Singapore Disabilities Sports Council)

i SWEAR the camp was boombz!
everything was great!
except for only the food ?
haha

i miss everyone

ive learnt alot too

ive learnt to look out for each other.
ive learnt that people with disabilities can also be like everyone else.
ive learnt that not only do they learn from us,
but we can learn from them too.
there's loads that i learnt.

i cant possibly thank this person enough
she was the one that made it even possible for me to attend this camp
she never gave up trying to help me
even though i missed the whole of day 1
because my dad didnt allow me to attend,
as a punishment for coming home late

this person also spared the time,
though she's VERY busy with the camp
to call me and pick up my calls
to discuss how to get me to attend the camp
she was even the one to speak to my dad over the phone,
succeeding in convincing him to allow me to attend the camp

she did a great deal for me,
though she was already VERY VERY busy,
and barely have time for herself,
even calling me during her break

that person is,
HUI BIN

im really grateful to you hui bin
hope you like the balloon flower i made for you on the way to
ORIENTUS RESORT (campsite)
i know its nothings, compared to what u have done for me

and im also very apologetic if ive been a burden
and i know ive been very troublesome,
causing u so much trouble when ure busy enough
im really sorry

and thanks again ! ^^

ahh, cant take hui bin enough

& thanks for the hug on the last day!
and sorry for wetting ur shoulder with me tears ><

the next group of people i would like to

is my team facilitators,

KEVIN AND YU QI

kevin has shown cared towards us

i also owe him a big thank you

for he actually sacrificed his bed for me

i came late,

only on the second day out of the four days of the camp

and it kinda messed up the rooming list

they put me in kevin's room

he had to sleep on the floor in his sleeping bag

ahh, feel so bad T.T

some of us in group 4(umbrella) also got him in trouble

not once at that ):

we're sorry kevin hope you like the "WE LOVE YOU,KEVIN" tag

with a msg at the back

though it was made out of simple cardboard

hope you appreciate

it that was all we had ):

and yu qi,

though he isnt really my group's facilitator,

he did a great deal also

since both our groups were in the same mass group

did alot of things tgt im even confused who's in which group

haha
but who cares

group 3: hysteria
group 4: umbrella
group 3&4 mass group : hysterella !

haha

so yeah, yu qi
he was very caring as well
very patient
and nice
and funny
and a backstabber!
he wore other group's identity!
haha kidding
he's still ours
HAHA

and it was sweet that he said " i love you" to us all after campfire
on the last night
it was very difficult for him to say it
because he only said it to his mom
awww

we kinda psycho-ed him to say it
okay fine, it was me HAAH

hafiz : yu qi, its the last night.
do you love us ):

he didnt reply

hafiz : (sighs deeply) hais, hysterella..
you see, someone doesnt love us
haiya...

(the rest giggled, yu qi too)

and then kevin came

hafiz: kevin..
do you love us?

kevin: yeah, of course?
why?

hafiz : well, someone else doesnt..
haiyaaa.. we so sad u know..

some others: ya lo.. hais..

yu qi: hey, who says i dont..
err
err
(stutters)

hafiz: haiyaaa.. nvm lah yu qi..
if you dont want to say it, we wont force you.. we understand..

yu qi: no no..
must sincere mah..
i...
love...
...

you...

(blushes)

everyone was aww-ing and laughing lah
such a sweet moment
^^

KEVIN AND YU QI
YOU BOTH HAVE UNLOCKED MY STORY
AND ALSO THAT OF HYSTERELLA'S

so thank you once again

and not forgetting
HYSTERELLA!
YOU GUYS WERE GREAT PEOPLE!
EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU!

thanks for mingling with me, though i came late
and it might be awkward for you guys
i felt very awkward when i first came,
didnt know anyone much
but you guys opened up to me
and warmed me up
so yeah,
I LOVE YOU AND THANKS SO SO MUCH !
^^

can't wait for attachment!
where we can finally give our volunteering services!

oh FYI,
eugene, gwen, deon and jia nie
are involved in this camp too
but we're all in different groups
but gwen's in yu qi's group
so we get to go tgt often

see you guys on monday for attachment !

------------------------------------------------------------------

(on the same day)
cabbed home with jia nie, eugene and gwen after camp
the taxi driver was DAMN annoying

jia nie: (trying to be friendly and funny)
uncle, its raining,
drive carefully okay? *smiles)

driver: you shouldnt say that, how can you.
its not right to say this kind of things to me.
i know what to do,
dont tell me what to do.
and blar2
and then he
blar3

and he moved on to other topics,
about duties of a women
lah dk what shit
VERY VERY LONG
from serangoon to jurong east NON-STOP

he also said in chinese that a girl , if not related to a guy,
should be very close(physically)
gwen figured that he was actl talking abt us both

cause we were busy camwhoring at the back
but we didnt care

i was camwhoring with gwen ,
using it as a distraction to not get annoyed by the driver
you know how easily annoyed i get
if i had listened to him throughout,
im just afraid my attitude would come out again
i dont want that to happen

jia nie was his target
he talked and talked and talked
and jia nie, tired enough
had to listen
she soon got pissed also

she felt that he didnt make sense at some points
and when she tried to rebut
the driver raised his voice even higher that of jia nie's
and said that she doesnt understand him
like psh?
he's the one who doesnt want to understand her
she's trying okay
and he said,
she'll understand when she grows up

wadde?

it started to rain
and got noisy
jia nie was even more pissed
trying to strain her ears to try and listen to him

she finally burst out
( in an annoyed tone )
when he was still in the midst of talking

" uncle can we drop this topic.
its raining and i cant hear you "

driver: cannot hear me?
( than stopped talking. )

and it was peace
haha

got home
quickly got ready
for balloon sculpturing
yet another event of making balloon sculptures for public
this time, for lucky draw
AT the cinemas haha

at gv vivocity

after so,
we got two free movie tickets
movie marathon, i should say
twilight and twilight saga(new moon)
the first one starts at 9pm

but we only stayed for twilight (i know, loser hor)
but jia nie and i had to go home,
and somehow the rest wanted too

especially that it was already late at night
and transport was a matter
my my
was it a suay day or what !

jurongvillians were all late for balloon
mr wong's face was black
eugene had a rough time on the phone with his mom
when he called to ask whether she could send us home after the movies
bcos it would be very late at night

gwen, for the first time,
decided to inform her mom on her whereabouts
trying to be a nicer daughter
but ends up being ticked off by her dad

i got ticked off also by mom
cos i tried to stay for the second movie

eugene went away from all of us
(gwen, jia nie, ming sian and i)

we feared that it was going to be the last train
and we were very worried about him
esp when he texted jia nie
" where are you guys"

jia nie called him and asked where he was
all of us very worried
he didnt want to say

we went out of the train, feeling scared
the doors were closing
and we tried to get back into the train
only jia nie made it in time
the doors close and she looked so scared

as the train passed by, gwen say eugene in the same train as we were
and we went out for ??

luckily, it wasnt the last train

but unfortunately,
THAT was the last train.
it only brought us to harbourfront
and then on, we're stuck about gg home

i started crying
cause the day was really very rough
and things still arent okay between my parents,
i was very worried
and eugene was mad at me
and and we didnt know what to do

jia nie dropped her wallet somewhere
headed back to look for it
everyone was alr stressed then

eugene also started crying not long after
we all didnt know why

took a bus

dropped,
flagged a cab

man,
it was raelly a rough day

gwen was dragged in also
my battery was flat,
and my mom contacted me through gwen's phone
obviously she wouldnt be pleased about that
esp when she's using pre-paid
im really sorry gwen ):
but luckily she was okay not long after

ming sian was the ony one without a problem that day
haha
he was in the cab filled with stressed people
jia nie, gwen, eugene and i
he must have been very worried huh

reached home at about 1am

wow?
for me that is

i seriously hate you now

2009-11-30T05:38:00.000-08:00

hate is a strong word,
but i really really really dont like you,
dad .

quotes

2009-11-27T05:18:00.000-08:00

Love makes the wildest spirit tame,
& the tamest spirit wild .

No one is more profoundly sad
than he who laughs too much.

To want something to stand,
you have to risk letting it fall .

WARRIOR

2009-11-27T03:20:00.000-08:00

HOPE HAS A WARRIOR

YOU.

YOU MAKE YOUR HOPES STRONGER

YOU MAKE IT HAPPEN

PICK UP YOUR SWORD,

&

FIGHT FOR YOUR HAPPINESS

AND THAT OF OTHERS'

interview

2009-11-24T05:08:00.000-08:00

OMG OMG OMG

MUHAMMAD AL-HAFIZ

GOING

INTERVIEWED !

HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH

this thursday,
26th november
at republic poly,
by
BERITA HARIAN
(malay newspaper)

woots !

ms lim says im chosen because
i am the leader,
i am malay,
and it makes it all easier for the interviewers/reporters
and that she chose me bcos she knows
that ive put in ALOT of hard work and effort into this
and she wants to let me have some recognition for it
^^

OH OH
JIA NIE GETS INTERVIEWED AS WELL!

but hers is on a chinese radio station
omg lahh
HAHHA

SO COOL SO COOL

so,
MALAYS!
READ YOUR BERITA HARIAN ON FRIDAY MORNING!
HARI RAYA HAJI IS NO EXCUSE FOR YOU NOT TO READ IT!
and for the non-malays,
you can get you malay-speaking friends to translate!

(okay, wth? )
HAHA

or alternatively,
just read it on my blog once i upload it.
most probably,
i will scan it and publish it here
HAHAH

but omg,
my malay vocab isnt so strong T.T
i rather it be in english!
hmm,
but they are going to edit it right?
haha,
i'll try my best then.

WISH ME LUCK YEAH !

fatigue

2009-11-23T05:55:00.000-08:00

fatigue

fatigue fatigue
worked from 9am-8.30pm
for the past two whole days

and this morning, had to be in school by 8.30 am
for grad night 2009 rehearsal
full dressed for the emcees
i had difficulty waking up today
esp when i reached home at midnight last night,
the latest ive ever gone.

and tmr, have to go to the holding sch at 9.30am
to recieve instruments coming from band room
and then another rehearsal at 1.30pm which clashes with band
meaning, after im dont with rehearsals,
i still have band

T.T

i havent had a nice long sweet lovely beauty sleep ):

even a guy yearns for a beauty sleep ya'know

and oh yeah,
eugene's gone again

he just came back from hong kong
3 days ago
and today,
he's going again
but this time on a 5-day cruise,
stopping by phuket
T.T

will dreadfully miss him more now
that he's going again
hais,

be quick eugene !! ):

CHAMPIONS !

2009-11-23T04:59:00.000-08:00

we are the champions

we are the champions
no time for losers
cause we are the champions

NATIONAL PUSHCART CHALLENGE 2009
21ST-22ND NOVEMBER

ENTREPENEURSHIP COMPETITION

CHAMPION !

AND ADDING ON TO THAT,

JURONGVILLE HAS ALSO WONT THE AUDIENCE VOTES,

IS ALSO FOR THE BEST DRESSED PUSHCART !

WE WON TWO CATEGORIES!
HO HO HO

MERRY TWISTMAS !

originality's the best!
in your face serangoon gardens !
for trying to compete with us ,
selling balloons.
you know we are better, MUCH, at that.
even with the promotion u had,
giving away free swords when customers buy something,
you are still nowhere near us,
for
we are the champions and
there's no time for losers.
you didnt even win any category
HAHAHHA

okay im mean,
but we've been tolerating with them lah please
we nearly gave away free balloons too,
but in the end didnt
because it only means we lacked confidence
and ms lim was right about that,
we CAN win w/o following them !

we were damn happy

we first lost the most creative business idea
we've been aiming it cause we think that ours was really creative,
to have sold balloons sculptures.
oh yeah, serangoon gardens -.-
psst, rita/nabilah saw them bursting balloons with scissors!
oh my, losers?
we use our fingers
and we also have balloon cutters HAHAH
more professional, i dare say
oh, and i did see for myself how slow and not confident when they twist
psh?

so we moved on,
hoping to win something else instead

we first won the audience votes
we were very happy, and contented enough at first
to have won that.
everyone was so elated.

as leader, i went up
and the rest cheered loudly

and then came the 2nd runner up (3rd) for overall
hua yi got it

1st runner up
some other school
i was actually hoping for this one
and oh my, the atmosphere was so tensed
my family and cousins were there too
everyone was silent in their own pushcarts

quite alot havent given up when 2nd place wasnt ours
frankly, i have alr given up,
despite arfian repeatedly telling me not to
and that there's hope

but i just went back and continued pumping balloons
just when i wanted to start pumping,
everyone suddenly started screaming aloud
yes, aloud
very very VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY

VERY VERY

L-O-U-D

we had won !
CHAMPION!

and they played the song
WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS
WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS
NO TIME FOR LOSER
CAUSE WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS

joanne felt like she was in a movie,
cause of the song blasting out and
everyone was like screaming their lungs out,
and even crying !

gg down the stage,
i finally let go of the long help tears in my eyes
gg back to the pushcart
to see everyone so so happy and crying
and hugging
and all those
made me cry even more

my family saw me,
gahh
and they know how much ive put in
gg back so so late almost every night
until my parents had to call the teachers up

jia nie couldnt stop crying
she works w me alot. especially when nearing the competition
joanne and eugene did a great deal too
and it really wasnt impossible w/o everyone else
they really worked very very hard!
matering their scultupures in just 3 practises,
5 hours each !

CONGRATULATIONS STUDENT BALLOONISTS OF JURONGVILLE!

i really didnt think we could become champion

at first, i had very high hopes
i think we did pretty well

collecting 800++ K
only for first day!
and total earnings was 1634 or somthing for both days
and profit is about 11_ _ .
to me, it was actually quite a lot.
in just two days.

than i had a 50/50 feeling
when it was the 2nd place
either us,
or pioneer that sold ice creams

than for first price,
i totally believed that it was going to be them! haha

gwen never believed that we would win

her reason was that,
we are a neighbourhood school
and and most of the time,
its the schools like raffles that would win.

and so, we proved her wrong haha

we've bought glory to jurongville
the organisers also had very VERY good comments on us
here are some of them

1. we were the BEST behaved out of ALL 15 pushcarts there
the others, they heard dialect and even vulgarities
they really really liked us

2. they could see the perserverence in us
working very hard ,
knowing twisting balloons is tiring
and that other stalls have products
and that are convenient to give to the customer immediately

3. they wa very VERY good teamwork amongst us
they saw us working tgt
and noticed the team spirit and bonding

our teachers also praised us alot
saying that we had integrity and confidence and such

and we excelled in EVERY aspect of our school values
P-R-I-D-E

P- perseverence
R- respect (customers & ourselves)
I- integrity (money & not gg against the rules)
D-discipline
E- excellence

and ms lim, also agreed by the other teachers,
said that we have been great GREAT ambassadors of JURONGVILLE!
it made us so proud of ourselves!

GO JURONGILLVE !

3 CHEERS!

HEAVY DUTY !

6 days

2009-11-18T18:36:00.000-08:00

6 days have passed !

WOOTS !

and EUGENE's coming back !

wait,

he said 6 days later

so is he coming back TONIGHT,
or issit TOMORROW?

aiya, heck care
what matters is he's coming back pretty soon !
so gonna meet up w him!
after he has settled down and rested, that is (:

and oh!
i have also gotta meet the close peeps in 3c

like
gwen, deon, zeke, colleen, pei ni, james, teng ooi, shafiq, sparrow

err, did i miss out anyone? HAHA

sometimes, i can really have this STM thingy

sometimes, i dont even remember i just relieved myself just a few minutes ago

and i start asking the person i am with,

" eh i want pee leh"
or
"eh follow me go toilet leh, im scared"

and the person would go,
" you just went there ! aiyoh"

and when ive realised that,
i'd respond :

either

" eh, have i ? oh, okay lor.. later lah."

or

" err, i think i didnt relieve myself fully just now.
so uhm, yeah, let's go again?"

(feeling abit stupid and embarrassed, HAHAHHAHAHA)

depends on who i am with, HAH

I'M MISSING PEOPLE !

've been busy lately ):

pushcart preparation, which dont only consists of practising balloon scultures
but also the posters,

and design of pushcart and stuff

and im also involved in the meetings and rehearsals
for grad night preparation

but im not complaining (:
it's kinda good that i have things to do
but i just dont wish that things get too much for me
i can't bite off more than i can chew HAHA
ceh ceh

and so far, things are going fine

well, only that ive been missing out in meeting my friends ):
hais,

oh, while im at it,

DO COME DOWN TO

CAUSEWAY POINT,

THIS SATURDAY AND SUNDAY

(21 & 22 NOVEMBER)

SUPPORT US BALLOONISTS!

JURONGVILLIANS !

don't you want our school to win !

we may not win the overall prize

for having to most profit

but we MAY win the

AUDIENCE VOTES

if YOU come down to support !

and vote !

FROM 10AM-9PM

AT THE ATRIUM, 1ST FLORR

PUSHCART NAME:

MERRY TWISTMAS!

PLEASEEEEEE

so uhm, i'll see you there?

MERRY TWISTMAS !

name credits to eugene's mom !

i pity you, MJ

2009-11-18T04:17:00.000-08:00

the legendary
MICHAEL JACKSON
can never rest in peace this way

not with these videos at least?
haha!

do watch?
it did manage to entertain me
well, annoy that is.
but it's worth a watch ^^

here's something else,
that's not related to MJ

but it's worth to be watched also.
dont worry,
i wont post lame videos

HAHA !

the guy in the video's a damn bastard
HAH

T.T

2009-11-17T04:26:00.000-08:00

DISNEYLAND

credits: gwen

jonathan said that there's no more free hairdying service
T.T
the hairdresser is already trained
so dont have to do any more free trials

damnnn..

but,
im still able to get the free haircut by him
a free haircut from toni&guy is also good right?

hmm, maybe i shall get the bottled dyes
and dye myself?
like almost everyone else is doing
hah !

hais, see how lah

doubts

2009-11-16T05:00:00.000-08:00

doubts

ugh!

i have doubts T.T

about the hairdye

im gonna have to go back to school a few times this month

and gonna have things to do with teachers like

mr tan jj

and miss joyce lim

i cant possibly be showing off my dyed hair right?

plus, i have band practises.
are we even allowed to?
especially when im the drum major at that

but ive seen 3 students so far with their hairdyed,

coming into school

should i just take the risk?

should i just spray temporary black everytime i wanna go to school?

but wont it spoil my hair?

im emcee for this year's prom night,

which is next week.
i do wanna have dyed hair for it?

AHHHHH

GAHHHH ...
helppppppp ):

eugene

2009-11-15T04:44:00.000-08:00

its the 3rd day eugene's in hong kong now

i miss him desperately ):

feel something missing,

he's the one i text most.

and now it doesnt even really matter much that my phone's confiscated
cause nobody texts me anyway?

EUGENE!

i await for your return!

haha

see, i post about you lor

you never post about me anymore one

grr

haha

contact me as soon as you read this!
or maybe, you wont even be reading this
doubt u'll read my older posts ):

hais

its okay.

HAHA

toni&guy

2009-11-14T04:26:00.000-08:00

it's settled then!
im going to have my hair dyed!

IF, the free trial thingy is still on.
jonathan hasnt been online lately.

my phone's confiscasted and i cant contact him ):

im still having doubts on the tone of brown

and whether it should be a highlight or bleach ):

hais,

maybe i should just ask the hairdresser when i get there.

it is a first class salon, so i can trust them

right?

HAH !

BRUNETTE

2009-11-12T04:47:00.000-08:00

brunette !

hannah says it suits me

arfian says it suits me !

faris(nco camp drum major friend) :

fxris says:
lol! smart smart. yes suits you!

dewi (nco camp drum major friend) :

Wee Chyou™ a.k.a Dewi Aniisa says:
YUPYUP !
you should !

Wee Chyou™ a.k.a Dewi Aniisa says:
NICE LA SEY !
CAN CAN CAN @

wooooh~

i really wanna do it man

the only thing that's in my way is my parents ):

wish they can let me

wish w me, people !

TONI & GUY

2009-11-11T05:29:00.000-08:00

(seleke much?)

WOOHOO!!

JUST PASSED OUT FROM

35TH NCO CAMP 2009 !

damn do i miss the ncos badly ):

will post more about this soon!

----------------------------------------------------

followed jonathan to TONI&GUY at somerset this afternoon

first class hardressing salon, he says

he said he could ask another friend for a free haircut

because his sister's friend works there or somthing(?)

and so, he decided to ask me

he made it sound so good.

and that he would pay me 10 bucks if i didnt like my new haircut.

haha

so i just went to try, not for the money of course.

but just wanna try, and wanted to go out somewhere.

its been so long since anyone asked me out.

so far, only him and a few nco friends only ):

and we reached.

we soon found out that the hairdresser jonathan recommended

only had time for one person today.

cos he has an apointment with a MODEL.

i was like, model? gahhh

the salon does hairstyling for models..

and im in it..

so yeah,

and only jonathan had his haircut today

ill have it next week

because there's band tmr and i have balloon sculpture tmr on friday

oh yeah,

i looked around and almost all the clients were caucasions/eurasions

aiyah, ang moh-s lah simply put (:

and there were beautiful young ones.

she was speaking about modelling to the hairdressing too.

and there was this middle-aged lady

who was rather vain and rather demanding

are ang mohs usually like this?

staff : " what style do you want, ma'am? "

lady: " i do not know what i want.

give me a composition.

tell me what he (referring to her wanted hairdresser)

can do for me.

show me a composition, something ! "

i was like, wadde?

okay??

and when her hairdresser came,

lady : " im sorry.

im not in the mood now.

i've waited for 2 hours.

i came at 12 and they told me that you were coming only at 2.

and they asked what i wanted,

and i told them i dont know.

now tell me, what can you do for me?

hairdresser : (keeps on a smile and replies her gently.)

so gentle that i cant even hear him! haha

so yeah,

cant wait for my turn !

elena said that her mum has her hair done at toni&guy

and prices are from 50to 70+

gahhh

and they do models !

double gahh

and jonathan also said that there's free hair dye !

and i was seriously considering.

they're having it free cause they wanted to practise on it

hmm

i wonder if my mum would let

hey, my bro dyed his hair before?

psh

i asked hannah if i should,

and she excitedly agreed

HAHA!

silly banana jang

brunette, she suggested

i dont know,

what do you think?

should i? or should i not ?

and what colour should i, if i decide to give it a go ?

(answer at me tagboard please! haha )

&you turned a deaf ear, yet again

2009-11-11T02:08:00.000-08:00

damn..

you're unfair ):

i never get a chance

you dont think about me

you dont care about me,

or what i say

or even what i feel

maybe i really am not as important to as i thought i was

sigh..

i give up.

do what you want..

somehow

2009-10-23T20:17:00.000-07:00

the other side

is but a shadow w/o your presence,

my other half

\m/_

WAS crushed enough, but IS shattered

2009-10-23T19:10:00.000-07:00

There's nothing I wouldn't do
To have just one more chance

To look into your eyes and see you looking back

---------------------------------------------------------------

How could this happen to me

I made my mistakes

I’ve got no where to run

The night goes on

As I’m fading away

I’m sick of this life

I just wanna scream

How could this happen to me

--------------------------------------------------------

I'm lying alone with my head on the phone
Thinking of you till it hurts
I know you're hurt too but what else can we do,
tormented and torn apart

I wish I could carry your smile in my heart
For times when my life seems so low
It would make me believe what tomorrow could bring
When today doesn't really know, doesn't really know

i'm all out of love; I'm so lost without you

I know you were right believing for so long
I'm all out of love, what am I without you?
I can't be too late to say that I was so wrong

I want you to come back so i can carry you home
Away from these long lonely nights
I'm reaching for you, are you feeling it too
Does the feeling seem oh so right

And what would you say if I called on you now
And said that I can't hold on
There's no easy way, it gets harder each day
Please love me or I'll be gone, I'll be gone...

all out of love- westlife

(w/some edition by myself)

SENTOSA

2009-10-23T05:32:00.000-07:00

XB
IT WAS MY FIRST TIME HANGING OUT WITH THE MALAYS!
(excluding jalan raya, of course)
AN OUTING WITH MAINLY MALAYS !

-SHAFIQ
-FAREEZ
-LYDIA
-NOORAFIQA
-RAHAYU
-RAHAYU'S FEMALE COUSIN
-RAHAYU'S FEMALE COUSIN'S BOYFRIEND

had an awesome time!

-friesbee
-water polo
-volleyball
-eat
-bury rahayu's cousin's boyfriend in the sand
-swim
-whistled at by referee, everytime we try to retrieve the frisbee or ball in the water
(i can swim okay, hmph!)
-bathe

in the afternoon, headed to vivo
FIRST TIME I SOAKED MY FEET INTO THE WATERS AT THE TOP FLOOR!
i know, noob huh
but its not my fault ):

everytime i go before, its either under construction or i dont have the time
for example, when i voluntereed to help perform with angklung there
and also when we had class outing, had to go sentosa straight
hais,

but it was nice to walk in ! HAH

btw, i forgot to mention
the water of the ocean was very the wierd that day
some regions were warmer and some were really cold
so the funny u know
u can feel it everytime u move around
dont know why

and and!
and i got bitten by plankton! (as usual)
on my left thigh!

soon, noora and shafiq also got bitten on the arm
then, i got bitten again!
on the arm also!
darn plankton, but we dont have KRABBY PATTY'S secret recipe !
screw you little creature -.-

IZATI BTE ABU HASYIM

2009-10-18T06:25:00.000-07:00

Dear Hafiz,

I just would like to say some words of encouragement after reading your blog(hope you dont mind :D)...

even though im not close to you anymore,
the moments I spent with you will forever be etched in my
no matter how hard I try to forget it.
Well, sometimes things are just meant not to be forgotten.
But yes, im not to forget that youre stll my fren to me.
So I hope you will just reflect after what I have to say
for I care for you like how I care for my best frens.

First of all, heres a poem for you,
made by my own best fren when i broke down,
when things went too hard for me, beyond my control...
i was so touched by the fact that she even bothered to create a poem :

Cry if you must

tears were one thing that God made

for you to release when victory fades

tears were the one thing that you could

take away the pain and bring you peace

i watched and stood and saw you cry

what could i give to make them dry

to see your smile shine once more

the beauty of joy like before

i could not understand your pain

yet you feel it time and again

what can i say that will heal the hurt

what can i do to rid the dirt

if tears were for crying

then so it must be true

that those that are dying

have nothing left to do

even without a lifetime

to look ahead and run

the race ends there

under the shearing sun

i lost my words to say

i cannot comfort you

but only stand to tell

whatever that is true

if you give up now

then those tears are wasted

cry as you will

the hardship you have tasted

but if you give up now

then there is nothing more

for me to hold on

and to adore

yet if you give up now

tomorrow is but a pain

but cry if you must

and try harder again

And yes, you dont ask for all these

but Life is nvr easy.

Rmb ur purpose of living, not to be in ur own wonderland,

but to worship God who created us,

to lean on Him and seek for his Strength,

for we are His servant and he is our God.

So then why live?

God created you, you are meant to be on this Earth,

so your presence is not a mistake.

So God will always give us trials, obstacles,

everything that is not easy and we have to go through them.

If you run away from them, you will suffer.

if you overcome them by seeking help from God,

you will suffer temporarily but you will be blessed behind all these,

heard of "Blessings in disguise"?

im sure you have.

Dont let the people around you be part of your identity,
determine who you truly are.
So what if theyre illegitimate? So what if they smoke?
yes it hurts cos they have the same blood as you.
but just rmb, it it YOU who decides who you want to be, not them.
So be good, and find your own Hafiz youre comfortable with,
the one who never fails to brighten up one's day.

Have you ever thought, why do you care so much of what ppl call you or think of you?
who are they to affect your feelings? You know urself best.

Above all scoldings and punishments by ur mum and dad,
they do all these cos they love you, they dont wanna lose you.
They dont want another son to end up like....you get what I mean.
youre their asset. Look on the bright side.
you think u suffer now and u have no life, too controlled by them,
but u will grow up to appreciate them.
Trust me, i feel the same way too. but i managed to overcome my childish thinking.

And pls, it is nvr too late to have hope and belief in yourself.
youre still young and ure wayyy more fortunate than ppl you dont know.
who cant even go to sch, who suffer from a broken family.

My brother passed away last yr,
5 days before my most important national race(cross-country) last yr.
then this yr, my grandma passed away.
My parents nvr fail to make me and my second bro upset,
they quarrel EVERYDAY and always mention about divorce.

I even went thru counselling b4,
cos my frens were worried that it wld affect my studies.
But on top of all these, i noe God had plans for me.
Life is unfair. But God is fair.
We have sinned so many times, but He nvr really punishes us really badly.

have u ever thought of it?
u mentioned so much vulgarities, have u ever met with an accident?
No matter how hard your life is,
God and your frens are there to support you hold you so you can keep going.
When the going gets tough, the tough gets going.
It will nvr end.

For everything you
go through, you know its part and parcel of life.
But the most important thing is not the suffering, its the blessing you gain behind it.

You dont realise, every hard time you face, you grow stronger.
A stronger Hafiz, not a sissy Hafiz.
Prove to your parents you are a good child.
Gain their trust, not rebel.

If you promise something, keep it. If you say you wont do it, then dont.
Im not sure whom you have lost; Gwen or Fiona,
but just to let you know,
true frens are hard to get, losing frenship is like a bitter pill which is hard to swallow.
Just pray that she will come back.
Its not the end of the world.
if youre the reason of why she left, i guess its not too late to apologise.
If it takes courage to go to her, then pluck up your courage and forget about your ego.

Last thing i want to say is, be proud.
Be proud that you have been going through all hardship
yet you are still standing up tall. Look up and face the sky.
I have faith in you that you can do all things with God's help.
Just by reading your blog, I kinda miss your old self.
I dont really know how youre like now, I wish I could talk to you again to find out.

xoxoxoxo,
Izati :D

" I can accept failing. Everyone fails at something. But I can't accept not trying." - Michael Jordan

-thanks izati ^^

A MATH

2009-10-13T06:30:00.000-07:00

i studied hard for it

i practised questions

ive memorised and understood almost all of the formulae needed

- binomial

-partial fractions

-logarithm

-indices & surds

-simultaneous equation

-remainder & factor theorem

-completing the square method

-coordinate geometry

after getting enough of F9 all these while,

i finally had hope of not only passing, but getting at least a c5

but somehow, i got a mind block

i somehow lost everything

i was doing quite fine before the paper

i got panicky

somehow, the things i knew how to do, just couldnt come out of my mind

i stared and stared

and though hard, very hard

i even hit my head numerous times in anger , and even stressed

eyes started to well up

i was so panicky

i was so afraid

my heart really felt as if it sank

i saw images of people im dissapointing

my tutor

my parents

and most importantly,

MYSELF,sitting pathetically in my seat, not able to sort out my thoughts

it was really blank

i never felt this way before, for any exams

i was ready before the start, able to answer almost everything when tested by friends

i screwed up

big big time

towards the end, the tears started to flow out

and soon, it was flowing consistently.

during collecting of papers,

james, who often mocks at me and laughs at my pathetic results,

whispered to me, "don't cry already.."

well, that didnt help.

you know how it feels, when you really feel like crying,

and then someone tells you not to,

the more you feel like crying huh

so yeahm there i went, crying even more

the invigilator saw through my pretence of being okay,

and asked why i was crying.

i faked a smile and said that it was nothing.

she then gave me a pat on my right shoulder before walking away

deon turned as saw me crying too

i saw his worried face, gesturing, asking why

it reminded me of how badly, how seriously bad i have done

and yeah you've guessed it,

more.

after dismissal, i texted my tutor,

telling her of everything that happened.

it was very difficult to hit that 'send' button.

teared before pressing it, hesitating

and cried after doing so.

it was really a tiring and rough day for me.

kept on crying.

never have i cried this much for an exam.

oh well, i failed to be a black horse i used to be,

jumping about 4 grades up for math last year.

its yet another F9 for me.

btw, the minimun marks ive lost for A MATH is,

well,

upon

astonished ?

just great

2009-10-07T03:57:00.001-07:00

i wished in front of them quite some time back

that these people wont ever leave me.

the closest friends, as in the one i am most open to

and die die dont want to lose

and can't live w/o

that are left

are

gwen eugene deon zeke

i rmb some time back when i lost a best friend, this was my convo w zeke

ALHZ:" zeke.. how many BEST friends do you have?

im losing mine, one..

by..

one.. ):

confirm you have more than me one.."

ZTZX" dont lame lah.. you friendlier and are more open leh.

you got how many left? "

ALHZ (counts silently with my fingers, thinking hard)

err.. hmm..

four..

(eyes starting to well up) "

ZTZX " (eyes widen) wahh.. i quiter than you, i have much more than you leh.."

GPWT(gwen) & DCHK (deon) : "aiya no lah.. its just that, you have a few best friends,

and you focus alot on them. zeke has more best friends, but yours are more precious to you.. and dont forget, you have alot of friends! so cheer up k! "

ALHZ : "( still sore )"

eh girl..

you have no idea how much i miss you.

you have no idea how many times i mention about you to the rest.

every single day.

i miss your loud outstanding voice .

i miss your loud laughter.

i miss hiting your forehead .

i miss treating you bandung.

i miss treating you milk tea.

i miss your bandung and milk tea treats.

i miss your ranndom jokes.

most importantly , i miss you ):

it isn't pioneer power w/o three, you know

happiness

2009-10-07T03:23:00.000-07:00

i was just thinking about and fixing the prose i wrote in my previous entry just a week back\keep having no time to post it

but who would have guessed what i wrote doesnt reflect my life anymore

after so long, finally,

after so SO long,

i can finally say im proud of my life.

im proud to say im enjoying life .

im proud to say everything's going perfectly fine and nothing's bothering me

or anyone around me.

gwen feels the same too.

what we felt ,

the quotes are

" have friends , and no more conflicts.

we are actually doing quite well now, concerning friendship "

"have stead (as gwen smiles w glee) "

'' nothing to worry about. everything's calm and we dont have to bother too much on anything''

i dont know why most of the time, we have the same feelings on the same day or period

the only thing we feel now that is bothering us is the EOY examinations

we cant wait till after exams when life is perfect enough !

we really were elated over the fact that life is great for us

and now,

after much gloating about it to ourselves because its just too exciting,

and what we've been waiting for after yonks,

our destiny's changing again..

going back to how it was

things aren't as care-free anymore

conflicts are building, though we arent involved, we feel the pain

as they are our friends.

we even see one of of the discrimanted ones cry

and the other one looks dissapointed and doesnt know who he can turn to.

i dare say we are proud of ourselves for still being able to be there for these two pitiful souls.

we're getting closer even (:

but that's not the point.

hatred can be felt in the room.

the tension's burning.

we don't know what to do,

how to solve it.

it bothers us.

i even dreamt of it last night, and that i was screaming at them wth?

and i already have my own problems too.

i dont wish to talk about it.

im happy for gwen that she and fareez are okay once again,

and still loving each other.

im happy for shafiq that fareez has finally apologised to him

and they have been talking

mdm alina gave us a psychology test today during mother tongue.

one of it was this :

3) apa yang kamu ingin capai dalam kehidupan?

- kebahagiaan.

3) what do you wish to achieve in life?

-happiness.

OCEAN

2009-10-03T08:14:00.000-07:00

-----------------------------------------

life for me now is like an

OCEAN

calm

smooth

cool

windy

breezy

everything's great now.

all i wish for is that no ships would appear from the distant

and create huge waves

and make it chaotic

and that triangles don't appear from the water's surface

------------------------------------------------

a) what do the triangles refer to?

- shark's top fin.

b) why does the pesona not want to see ships and triangles?

- they represent troubles and problems.

ships can create big waves when they pass

and sharks means danger.

this means that their existence disturb the serenity of the calm ocean.

c) what is the pesona's attitude towards life?

- his attitude is positive. he is liking life now, and feels that it is very calm

and he wishes for no problems to come and spoil the peace.

d) who is the writer of the prose?

- AL-Hafiz .

IMPERFECTION

2009-09-16T05:49:00.000-07:00

Being imperfect only means you're perfect,

as noone is.

so, go on and say proudly,

'' I AM IMPERFECT ''

FRIENDSHIP

2009-09-16T05:30:00.000-07:00

FRIENDSHIP;

- is about acceptance and love

- about having differences, so that there are things and views to share on things

instead of being bored of listening to someone commentson things you alr feel

-is also about having similarities to share,
both differences and similarities are needed

- is about quarelling, talking it out and making up, becoming even closer than before

- is about forgviness

- a true one, doesnt have an ending

- is for everyone, even whether you get it in return or not

- is happiness and bliss

- is strength and hope

- is difficult to build, but oh so easy to break

- is like trust ;

once broken, difficult to mend

so here's a shoutout to everyone ,

treasure all your friends , especially the closer ones,

as though it's the last day you're gonna spend w him/her.

if you feel that you're drifting apart, try not to let it happen,

it wont do good to both parties.

if he/she doesnt take the move to bridge the gaps, then you do it.

do not forget to shower enough care for any other friend,

do not disappoint you friends, especially the best

do not keep upsetting and angering them.

do not let your pursit of happiness and laughter

cause his/hers to not be achieved.

do not be selfish.

do not start regretting only when you've lost him/her .

do not,

be like me.

ALHZ

2009-09-16T04:58:00.000-07:00

is everyone's life like this?
or is it just mine?

the boy who jokes around all the time,
the boy who makes people laugh
actually faces more problems than average
oh, how ironic..

- to be labelled as a gay & not to be accepted by best friend IF i was

- to be labelled as a gay by my own mum when we were quarelling. it already crushes my heart when my own best friends or even normal friends say that of me, what more my OWN mother..

- to be locked out from 8-10pm till i fell asleep on the seat outside my house, followed by whipping of the belt by mum and also caning by dad. all these not too long ago, and the cane marks still show clearly on my thighs. and all these even when im alr 15

- to face quarels w/someone every now and then

- to face the fact that there are actually 4 illegitimate children in my whole family, one by someone v close to me

- to have uncontrollable anger managements that only leave regrets

- to lose people one by one, though slowly. how many can i have left in the very end?

- to try so hard to change my attitude but just dont know how, and it just seems difficult

- to never be able to last a genuine smile throughout at least a week straight

- to see cousins, of different ages, change, from innocent to not .
smoking boy when only in primary 5, smoking girls, girls becoming 'minah' .
i really dont think i like my mum's side anymore, neither does my sis.
we very much prefer our father's side. besides, we are more closer tgt.

basically to have a complicated and problematic life,
but people miss out how miserable it can get.
people tend to not see..

i do not ask for all of this..

just how do i say, when noone sees but the good?

am i strong enough?

i've faced all this, but can i take more?

-ALHZ

people are people and the most prettiest things in life
are actually embracing the whole shit of hell.
these are life skills we need to lean in order to survive the world
patience is one technique that most lack but are only considered magical
to those who knew the powers in it.
presence of darkness is supposed to guide us to light.
have faith in life, for life's been gracious to us all along
so that we could live and enjoy light .

- nabilah

thanks nabilah!
it really did make me feel better after reading it,
but its not permanent );
i cant get things out of my mind..

but thans ALOT!
i really really appreciate it (:

jeans

2009-09-12T21:01:00.000-07:00

credits: msn.com

i like these kinda jeans!(not the colour part)

not too tight,
and not too baggy .

and i like it when it folds up a few layers at the bottom
hah

BUT I DO NOT KNOW HOW OR WHERE TO GET THEM
ahh, stupid me

H-E-L-P GUYS !

I HATE YOU

2009-09-12T20:52:00.001-07:00

you bloody faggot

apparel

2009-09-11T06:50:00.000-07:00

DAMN DO I NEED NEW TOPS !

but where , where
where to get nice ones!
somebody help !

simple,yet nice tees ?
nice cool shirt ?

anything that you think can suit me!
i seriously need suggestions man.
always dont know where to get apparels.

the t-shirt im most proud of is
my green emporio armani tee
i need more to be proud of ! hahah

HELP

love - a losing game ?

2009-09-11T06:07:00.000-07:00

LOVE

is more of giving it
rather than getting it .

is more for that special someone
rather than someone (you have feelings for or not) to you .

is poison
but may be a blessing in disguise .

is a dream or nightmare
depending on how you see it .

LOSS OF LOVE

is dreadful
as you feel that everything you ever needed is gone .

makes you weaker
or makes you stronger .

makes you blame your partner for it
or even blame yourself for it .

makes you thank him/her ;

for having once given the opportunity of getting together,

for the precious memories and moments you went through together
which made life more meaningful and colourful,

for the problems and hurt which makes you stronger, instead of weaker .

The true meaning of love
and the loss of it is what you want it to be.

you decide whether you want to be weakened by it,
or get stronger because of it .

you decide whether to put the blame on your partner or even yourself
for the loss of it
instead of being grateful for being given the chance of having it before.

okay, i dont know why im posting this.
haha random.
wonder if what i said makes sense.
haha comment ?

drum major

2009-09-03T05:27:00.000-07:00

woots !

mr chua said that he saw a big improvement
in the way i conducted drills today
he also said to train ashiqin and guide her properly
so that when i graduate, the standard that i have already put
won't go down again
gahh, he said that i've created a higher standard !
^^
he also said to maintain whatever i am doing,
and better, to even increase it to another level

seryyyyyyyyyyyy!!!
ive done you proud ma'am !!

but its not the end, i'll make u even proud !
XB

sery totally touched me and made my dreams come true

when i was going to a hell of a rough time,
trying my best to prove to mrs chee that i can be the upcoming drum major,
but only seeing myself failing everytime
(well, who doesnt know that mrs chee's the biased type huh)
i told sery,
my wish now,
is to be facing you as you take the sash off and approach me with it
and as you put it over my shoulders,
you'd whisper to me, saying that you are proud of me..
but i doubt i can see that anymore..
i really feel like giving up alr

during rehearsals of the passing down of sash ceremony,
she gave me a rather cold shoulder
i smiled widely while facing her, but she didnt react the way i expected she would

the actual one came
we were standing in sedia position
since it was a formal occasion, i only showed a serious face
she 'psst' me and caught my attention

she whispered,
" hafizzzzz ..(smiles)"

and i went,
" seryyy... its time... ahhhhh (smiles) "

" hafizz, im so proud of you! (giggles) "

"(my eyes enlarged) really??? oh-my-god..."

then as she finished put it over my shoulders,she gave me a tight hug
it was really really a touching scene
tears really wanted to come out
but shock took over my whole body
my eyes enlarged
and i couldnt even move my body to hug her back !
and i wish i did !

she totally surprised me

THANK YOU SERY MA'AM !

YOU'RE THE BEST DRUM MAJOR SENIOR I COULD EVER ASK FOR
we've went through alot tgt
and also individually
i wont forget the times we were there for each other,
listening to our woes about drum major stuff

and as i went down from the stage,
newly appointed as current drum major,
with the red sash over my left shoulder and a mace to call my own

i went over to adila and she congratulated me and along with khai seng,
shook my hand .
upon hearing me say
" ahh, the time has come. it's finally time, the time ive been waiting so long for.."
syazwani started crying
she alr held in her tears since we played
can you feel the love tonight from lion king
and then watching the touching passing down of sash ceremony
and that sentence simply made her let out all the tears kept

i didnt realise that she was so proud of me
i didnt know anyone was

after a while, zany came up to me and told me that she actually cried for me
it was also a shock to me,
i didnt know that anyone would even cry for me, esp for this
then i told her ,
" its time right, im so so happy. all my hard work has paid off ! "
and she said
" ahh hafiz, dont make me cry again ! (starts tearing) "

and i started tearing too
and we hugged

" dont cry zany, you're making me cry too!
ahh.. i didnt know anyone would be this proud of me.."

"come one hafiz, everyone's proud of you,
everyone know how hard you worked for it . "

and we teared even more
HAHAH

so yeah, it was a really happy moment for me,
the passing down of sash and also knowing that there are people who are proud of me
^^

speaking of graduation party,
i damn miss the seniors alot ):

syazwani most, because she's the one i spend most of my time in band with

it feels wierd w/o sery being there
it feels wierd not having shaffiqa and atiqah to look at and communicate with sign languages
while playing timpani ):

it's empty w/o adila's crazy antiques

its empty w/o the seniors ):